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| Little Dancer |
Lying on my bed,
still and alone, I stare at my ceiling and listen. I hear trucks passing on the highway, tires
hitting ruts in the overused pavement.
Horns honking as pedestrians and drivers battle for right away. Dogs bark, asserting their authority over their
domain. Voices yell, as domestic
disputes spill outside the door of frayed homes. My own house creaks and sighs as wind and
weather rattle against its walls. Cats
cry and scurry within my rooms, affirming supremacy over one another. My own heart beats and races, never stopping
or resting. Blood cells pump through my
veins in the ever constant attempt to appease the demanding cells they
serve. My lungs pull in air, seeking the
precious unseen oxygen, never reaching satisfaction. Thoughts race on tracks through my mind, in a
race that has no beginning or end. Even
in the stillness, nothing is still.
For we know that the whole creation
groans and labors with birth pangs together until now. Not only that, but we also who have the
first-fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly
waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body. Romans 8:22-23
In a world ever
seeking for peace and “tranquility”, nothing is at peace, nothing is ever
still. Every body, every mind, every
cell is battling for its space, its time.
The body lusting for pleasures and fulfillment. The mind seeks answers and affirmation. The constant rustle of disquiet ever
lingers. Even though my eyes cannot see
and my ears cannot hear, my mind knows that the groaning and pains do not just
rest at the limit of my senses. Babies
cry in hunger, children weak with thirst, men no place to lie down, woman no
clothes to wear. Forests are torn down,
rocks are dug up, oceans become stale with death and air polluted with
muck.
Then to Adam He said,… “cursed is the
ground for your sake; in toil you shall eat of it all the days of your
life. Both thorns and thistles it shall
bring forth for you, and you shall eat the herbs of the field.” Genesis 3:17-18
Laying here on my
bed, every second I age, every second a part of me dies. When Lord?
When will it all end? Lord when
will the battle, the destruction take it final plunge?
For we do not wrestle against flesh
and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of
the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly
places. Ephesians 6:12
In a realm
between sleep and awake, in a place the mind and imagination surge together, I
see. I see the Lord’s hand stretched out
to this restless dying vessel that contains me.
With the touch of His hand, the decaying flesh of this life is stripped
away. It falls to the dust like a
withered husk. In its place I stand, a
new me. I body no longer hungry or thirsty, no longer tired or weak. Skin bright and glowing. Flesh warm and light. The air around me wraps me in its warm
embrace like a wool blanket. The earth
beneath my feet, soft and smooth, secures and protects my steps. The Lord holds my hand and in the cool comfort
of the trees we walk. Water flows from
the ground beautiful and clear. Birds
sing in the air and deer graze in the fields.
I look around and see so many others, some I should know, some I do not
but we are new, new bodies, new flesh.
Together we walk, never tiring, never thirsting. We just enjoy the pleasure of His company.
For our citizenship is in heaven, from
which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will
transform our lowly body that it may be conformed to His glorious body,
according to the working by which He is able even to subdue all things to
Himself. Philippians 3:20-21
I wake and find
myself still on my bed, still in my room, still in my decaying flesh. The moment has not come. My body is still
dying. The world is still waiting, still
paining for His return. But a voice in
the stillness speaks to me, reminds me that I am not alone. Though my body is dying and weak, His Spirit is
strong.
“I have been crucified with Christ; it
is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in
the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Galatians 2:20
So here I am still,
in His hands I wait and I LIVE.
For to me, to live is Christ, and to
die is gain. Philippians 1:21
